Welcome to Wev’s world



I’m an idiot. And I’m proud of it. And if you’ve somehow stumbled upon this website and are reading this manifesto, I am assuming you are an idiot too.

I’ve spent my whole life doing stupid shit. Proper stupid shit.

But… I’ve somehow managed to survive the stupidity and live a pretty fulfilling life. I was born in the gutter and will no doubt die in the gutter, but have had a whole lot of fun in-between those two troughs of doom.
So, what’s this DOPE shit all about then?

Stupidity. It’s about my stupidity, your stupidity, his stupidity, her stupidity, their stupidity. It’s about every f*cking stupid c*nt’s stupidity. And it’s about us owning that stupidity.

Every single one of us is a dim-witted fool. It’s just most people don’t realize or want to realize it. Stupidity is inbuilt in us all from birth. Look at kids: they’re forever fooling around. It’s just that when you ‘mature’, some people get too caught up in their own existence, that they forget to keep up with the shenanigans of youth.

I honestly thought that as I got older, there would be a time when I’d suddenly mature into a miserable old c*nt. I was expecting to wake up one day and some misery switch would all of a sudden have turned my inane guffness off. Fortunately, it didn’t and I hope yours didn’t too.

DOPE will take you through tales of my stupidity and remind you of your past glories. I want to show the world that stupidity is the elixir of life.

It's time for a DOPE revolution


Here's a wee snippet from something I have previously written. It won't make any book on stupidity, cos it ain't about stupidity and it ain't made it past the editorial process of my partner in grime, but hopefully it'll be something you'll enjoy.

I'll repeat again: it didn't get past the editorial process, so this is pretty rough - but you're getting a free read, so don't frigging expect something amazing:

Cock Hand

I've never really been comfortable getting all naked in front of other men, but have had to endure such pleasures when I have played football.

After every game, the lads would all get naked in the changing room and have a communal shower together. I just could never bring myself to join in. And the boys thought I was some sort of wally for not showering with them. After each match and everyone had showered, we would all go down to the local boozer for a couple of libations. Them, fresh after their hot showers. Me, still smelling sweaty after my refusal to cleanse.

We were a distinctly average team who usually lost. However, there was one occasion when we surprisingly beat the league leaders, 1-0.

After the match, there was much celebration and camaraderie in the changing room. The team all stripped off and jumped in the shower together, a hubbub of laughter and papaya extract. I stripped down to my pants and started putting my shirt and trousers onto my dirty, sweaty and stinking body. As usual.

After a couple of minutes, the lads all started jovially emerging from the shower, led by the captain, Guffy McDougal. At his locker, Guffy pulled a big tub of Vaseline out of his washbag. He scooped out a healthy portion of the lube and slapped it all over his newly cleansed nether regions. He gave his cock and balls a really good rub down for more than thirty seconds, then started doing the rounds of the changing room, shaking the team’s hands with the hand he’d just molested himself with. Either nobody noticed this or didn’t care and happily grabbed his hand in communal celebration. Some of the lads even leant in and gave him a full-on naked man hug.

On Guffy’s congratulatory round of man love, I was the fifth person in line, and became increasingly worried about what I should do when he got to me. As Guffy was working his way around the room, I quickly calculated that if the others had been drying themselves after the shower, then the original cock hand could have a manhood multiplication factor of five by the time it got to me, due to the other cock hands it would have clasped enroute to me.

Guffy approached me and offered me his hand. I looked down at it. Panic coursed through my soul. I looked up at Guffy’s gleaming, happy face. I looked at his hand again. I looked at Guffy.

“Get your greasy, f*cking cock hand away from me, you c*nt.”

where to get it

You’ll only be able to get the colour version of the book from this website. Amazon and anywhere else will be the black & white version. The price of the book is the same, but I will need to charge postage. Therefore, it will cost you a little bit more. but the product is about a million times better.

Get color version
Amazon shop

The stoned & stupid misadventures of a

wally named Wev

"Stupidity is infinitely more fascinating than intelligence. Intelligence has its limits while stupidity has none."

Claude Chabrol

"Intelligence is unprincipled, but stupidity is honest and straight forward"

Fyodor Dostoevsky

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity; and I’m not sure about the universe"

Albert Einstein

"It is only because of their stupidity that they are able to be so sure of themselves "

Frank Kafka

"There are only two paths to happiness in life. Utter stupidity or exceptional wealth"

Zlad K Abdelnour

"it's dope to be a dope smoking dope"